I, Frankenstein

It’s been nearly 200 years since Mary Shelley and her poet friends got together in a mansion in Lake Geneva and challenged each other to write the best ghost story. The fruits of those labors wrought a significantly chilling parable about a mad scientist who foolishly reanimates a deceased man stitched together with spare body parts from other corpses. At a time when science was exploring new territories and pushing boundaries, Frankenstein was conceived as a terrifying morality tale about the dangers of playing God. Rumor has it Shelley dreamt up her classic gothic horror tale in the midst of a whirlwind binge of hedonistic orgies and hallucinogenic substances. Think Jane Austen meets The Wolf of Wall Street.

Two centuries later, Shelley’s unholy creation is still prowling around just as surly and misunderstood as he ever was, but this latest film does virtually nothing to honor its original source. In I, Frankenstein, the iconic monster gets caught up in the ongoing war between the armies of the Gargoyles and the Demons—or was it the Jets and the Sharks? I could expound further upon the plot, but trust me, it’s completely irrelevant.

814frank.box.jpgThis film is ridiculous in the extreme, but I have to say, the picture and sound quality are pretty good. I found the 3D picture, though, a little flat and unimpressive in comparison with other films in the format. The intent was there but not the follow-through. The 2D version shines, however; imagery is consistently sharp and vibrant, and the sulfur and brimstone are palpable. The 5.1 DTS-HD Master Audio is exceptional. Dialogue is laughably awful, but it’s always crisp and clear. There’s also chaos and carnage aplenty to pulsate and pound through your speakers, and directionality is well maintained in the surrounds. A climactic battle that leaves the Notre Dame Cathedral in smoldering ruins is demo worthy.

Extras include two audio commentaries, two short featurettes, and the trailer.

We’ve recently seen a flood of historical figures and characters from classic literature reveal their true nature as ultimate ass-kickers in supernatural thrillers: Abraham Lincoln apparently hunted vampires, Jack is killing giants, Hansel and Gretel are slaughtering witches, and Frankenstein’s monster is now sending demons back to hell. I personally can’t wait for Huckleberry Finn: Martian Mutilator and Frédéric Chopin: Sasquatch Slayer in 3D.

Blu-Ray 3D
Studio: Universal, 2014
Aspect Ratio: 2.40:1
Audio Format: 5.1 DTS-HD Master Audio
Length: 119 mins.
MPAA Rating: PG-13
Director: Stuart Beattie
Starring: Aaron Eckhart, Bill Nighy, Miranda Otto

Goyoishere's picture

From reading your post its pretty clear that you thought this was a bad movie. I would like to make a suggestion to add a ratings bar on what you all think of the movies you review. Your opinions are just as important (more so in my opinion) as any movie critic to those who subscribe to this magazine/website. It would be great in the future to have a quick reference as to your thoughts about the movie itself. Sometimes a quick glance at all the high star (or low star) ratings on sound, picture, etc. can be misleading as to your thoughts on the movie itself. Just a suggestion.