Signals

I crossed my fingers. I carried a rabbit's foot. I went out in the backyard and found a four-leaf clover. I started eating Lucky Charms for breakfast. I rearranged the furniture in my home theater according to feng shui (good for luck, not so good for sound). I did everything I could. But now I see that I have failed. People like the Amazon Echo Dot. They like it a lot.

Do you hate the silvery sound of CDs? Then you can rejoice because a bunch of them just got crushed. Do you think LPs are just scratchy pieces of plastic? Then be happy because a load of them just got crushed too. In fact, a misunderstanding between two bands with automotive-inspired names recently resulted in an apocalyptic day for physical media.

The year is 1962. You are working at Decca Records and your job is to listen to audition tapes and pass along your evaluation. The next demo tape on your endlessly replenishing stack is from some unsigned band calling themselves The Beatles. You mount the tape on your machine and listen for a few minutes. Then you rewind it and put it back in its box. Pass.

All men shall become brothers. At least that’s what Schiller proposed in his Ode to Joy, a proposal tunefully endorsed by Beethoven. In practice, we sometimes act more like distant cousins, or like neighbors who scream at each other and throw dog poop on each other’s lawns because one guy votes democrat and the other votes republican. Local law enforcement knows who we are. And then there’s analog audio guys and digital audio guys.

2020 was not a particularly good year. In fact it was a horrible year. Normally, at year's end, we're supposed to reminisce about the year. But I think we'd all rather forget that 2020 ever happened. Let's ignore it, and instead skip back all the way to 1984, to a story about a Christian rock band, an LP record, and a very mysterious inner groove.

This is my last communication. Outer walls breached. Door is splintering. Hinges giving way. Out of ammo. Just one grenade left. I’ll take as many as I can with me. God have mercy on my soul.

The 2023 holiday season was another last hurrah, this time for DVDs and Blu-ray Discs...